i miss you:'(

Dear my blog,

i feel like getting emo here, like seriously emo!

i don't know whether this is too private to write in this blog but i don't want this problem burden me anymore. :S

As you guys know puasa is getting nearer like what five more days kali.

Honestly speaking, i'm in dilemma. Should i be happy or in the other way?

I miss every single thing about Ramadhan that i used to have three years back.

Babah,

how could you do this to us?

How could you ruined this smile in our face?

how could you make us cry out loud?

we had been through this sadness for years

and yet it didn't cross your mind to realize how precious we are.

Our world turns dark when you run away.

Where are you when your baby need you?

The success that i achieve are for you and mumy.

you leave us in vain.

And that makes me hate you even more

And i couldn't/won't remember in what ways you makes us smile.

I have to admit this,

I miss you.

Bah, we deserve a better life.

I miss the noise that we used to have before sungkai,

I still can remember the position that we used to have in the dining room,

I miss waiting for you after raya prayer in the morning,

'salam' you and mumy.

And i miss the kiss that you used to give us.

I can't help anymore,

I can't feel the real smile that draws in my face before,

i have to be strong for adik-adik

and i have to pretend that i'm happy when i'm not.

But Bah,

in this stage we are fine without you i guess.

syg, i feel like screaming right now sigh :S

this both picture was taken like what 3 years ago.

Good Charlotte- emotionless

Hey Dad,

I'm writing to you,

not to tell you that I still hate you.

Just to ask you how you feel

and how we fell apart,

how this fell apart.

Are you happy out there in this great wide world?

Do you think about your sons?

Do you miss your little girl?

When you lay your head down,

How do you sleep at night?

Do you even wonder if we're alright?

but we're alright,

We're alright...

Its been a long hard road without you by my side.

Why weren't you there all the nights that we cried?

You broke my mother's heart,

You broke your children for life.

Its not okay,but we're alright.

I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes,

but Those are just a long lost memory of mine.

I spent so many years learning how to survive,

now I'm writing just to let you know I'm still alive.

The days I spent socold,

so hungry,

We're full of hate,

I was so angry

The scars run deep inside this tatooed body,

Theres things I'll take to my grave,

But I'm Okay, I'm Okay.

Its been a long hard road without you by my side

Why weren't you there all the nights that we cried

You broke my mother's heart

You broke your children for life

Its not okay,but we're alright

I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes

But those are just a long lost memory of mine,

Now I'm writing just to let you know im still alive,

And I'm still alive.

and Sometimes I forgive Yeah,

and this time,

I'll admit,

That I miss you,

Said I miss you

Its been a long hard road without you by my side

Why weren't you there all the nights that we cried

You broke my mother's heart

You broke your children for life

Its not okay,but we're alright

I remember the days you were a hero in my eyes

But Those are just a long lost memory of mine,

now im writing to just let you know im still alive

And sometimes I forgive,and this time

,I'll admit,

That I miss you,I miss you,

Hey Dad...